Have you thought about how much time you spend per day hooked on your mobile or tablet? How much of that time are you with your children? We probably don't realize (or don't want to realize), but these mobile devices catch us more and more, to the point of, sometimes, subtracting time we spend with children. Real time.
Because we may be next to the kids, but absorbed by the phone. Undoubtedly one of the disadvantages of using the mobile today is that it causes us self-absorption and close disconnection with the environment. That is why we cannot use the phone while driving, for example, or more and more road accidents occur because pedestrians are looking at the screen and not around us. We can't be both. How we cannot be "really" with the children while we get hooked on the mobile.
Physically yes we are with them, that is clear, but if we really want to take advantage of a time share with the children, being looking at the phone is incompatible. I do not say that we have to disconnect at all or do not answer a call, which, in these times, is quite unreal. But if we start to go through the whatsapps, to answer them, to check the mail, to play with that application that we like or to surf the Internet, we are obviously not sharing with the children. Can't expect many of those actions?
The example we give them
Surely we will have some other times of the day to do all of the above with our phones and tablets, without the children in front. We have to think that, if we don't want children to start asking us for a phone number with five years or that they consider it essential at ten and do not disengage at 12, it is advisable to run away from certain behaviors.
I am the first to feel something "hooked" on the phone, of course I do not deny its use, that would mean being out of reality. It is clear that new technologies are present in an important way in our lives and more will be present in those of our children. They shorten distances, develop skills, learn through them and access any information immediately. But excessive use of the screens in the presence of children and apart from them we move away.
That is why there are certain rules that we try to follow at home (and we do not always achieve, we are in it) to avoid giving them a bad example and that mobile phones do not absorb us.
Ten steps to disengage from mobile and hook children
No mobile phone in the morning. In the hustle of the preparations to go to school, it does not seem the most appropriate time. The rush and desire and not be looking at the phone as soon as we open our eyes do not turn on the Wi-Fi connection in the morning. With luck, those free minutes can be dedicated to talking for a while while we have breakfast, prepare lunch together or make a special hairstyle ...
No mobile or tablets to the table. Lunchtime or dinner time is for that, not to consult or write messages. When the girls are in front or when we are alone if they are in the school canteen (it turns out that for the couple it is also good to talk for a while face to face), at home we try to leave the mobile phone apart.
Messages can wait. If your daughter says "Mom, a message has arrived" and you leave everything you are doing to go look at it, the message we give you is that there is nothing more important than that message. Let these messages ring or put the phone in silence, surely nothing happens to read them after an hour or two, when the children are lying down.
If the children claim you, stay away from the screens. While doing homework, they play alone ... we can take the opportunity to look at what we have to look at on our mobile devices or on the computer, but if they call us, if they require us to help them with something or they have just finished doing what they were doing alone and want Be with you, you have to attend to them.
Do not get lost in front of them, because they can really be talking to our side and not finding out. A Candy Crash screen or a "conversation" by instant messaging can absorb us.
Talk to them and play with them. As in the announcement of some coffee shops: "We don't have Wi-Fi, talk to each other".
Put the phone in silence. To achieve many of these purposes, simply remove the Internet connection or silence it if we are playing with our children.
Nothing mobile in the park. Because it would be to be with them but without being, in a place like the park, where they should be guarded to avoid risks and also have a good time with us. One thing is to check a message, but losing sight of them because of the screens is not convenient.
If you need to search for something on the Internet or answer a message, explain why. Sometimes there is something you can't wait, look at it together.
The screens are fun and useful if we use them together. We can take pictures, send a funny message to dad or mom, communicate with grandparents, play together for a while ...
Think again. How many hours do you spend with your children a day? Do you look at them and talk to them or the screens? Does your child get your attention so you leave your cell phone? Or maybe he claims you differently? I think we should pay more attention to these issues and make an "amendment purpose."
Maybe we start with a couple of points from the previous ones and in the end we get them almost all ... at least before they grow up and have their own phones. And hopefully then they won't get hooked on the screens either and don't look at us or talk to us, but let's continue sharing good times with our children.
Photos | iStockPhoto
In Babies and more | Get rid of your cell phone and connect to your children
