I am not going to say that the current agenda of childbirth preparation classes is bad or that it is useless, in my opinion there is everything, good things and things that do not take place.
But I think it would not be bad if in those classes someone explained to you or at least commented, some of these Ten lessons that should be taught in childbirth preparation classes.
Lesson 1: How to manage hospital visits?
Here we tell you what it can mean to have the room up to family and friends hours after having brought your child into the world.
Lesson 2: repeat with me; The child is hungry and will eat, put on the world as it gets.
We have already seen several times the problems that something as natural as a chest can lead to many people, therefore I think it would be convenient to understand that you carry a weapon, (sorry, two) loaded (normally) and that you should know how to use it.
Lesson 3: how to sleep your baby in three comfortable steps.
Step 1. take your baby in your arms.
Step 2. Start singing a song in a calm tone and as loving as possible.
Step 3. Walk from side to side of the room until the baby falls asleep.
Lesson 4: change the diaper
Rookie mode Change the baby in the house changer, with diaper, wipes and cream on hand, while looking at you smiling.
Advanced mode. Change the baby with monumental anger, and poop coming out of the armpits. The pack of wipes has gone to the tub with a kick and the only diaper you have left is in the car bag, in the middle of the room. Did anyone say fear?
Expert mode Change the baby on his knees, in a cabin of 1 square meter and with one hand. It is more or less the space they will have in the bathroom of a restaurant and do not worry they will end up doing so with their eyes closed.
Lesson 5: prepare dinner / lunch.
With baby grabbed one of your legs (rookie mode).
With baby in arms (expert mode). With baby in arms, insisting on putting my hand in the boiling oil (mode I can no longer).
Lesson 6: manage the experts' lactation tips
We refer to the experts around you, that is, your mother, your mother in law, the neighbor of the fifth, the deli, the mothers of the park, etc.
Lesson 7: 270 degree vision
It is believed that there are mothers who have achieved a vision of 365 degrees capable of going through babys pockets and kindergarten backpacks.
Lesson 8: knowledge in children's songs
Novice Level: First CD of the cantajuegos.
Intermediate level: Complete collection of songwriters.
Expert level: Complete collection of song sets, lullabies from the 18th century. In Spanish, English and German chattering.
Lesson 9: How to be a mother, woman, wife, friend, confidant, boss, secretary, daughter, playmate, police, nurse, teacher
And do it well enough to pass the exam to which society is going to submit you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Lesson 10: being parents
So, dry, without further additions, without worrying about whether you do better or worse, putting love and common sense in your day to day, enjoying your child while everything else stays in the background (including nine previous lessons)
