The emotional health of children is today a topic that worries parents and educators. Children have, without a doubt, great capacity to recover from difficult situations, but it is also true that what we, adults, receive, will form their image of themselves and will teach them to relate to the world. Can we do something to help them grow emotionally healthy and be happier? Of course you can, and it is preparing them for life. My answer is that parents and educators have the key to the emotional health of children and their vital success in all areas and that is why We will give you these four tips that will prepare your children for life.
We are their models, their referents, the mirrors where they look. What we do and say is going to make them look one way or another and value themselves for what they are, not for what others expect of them. The ability to set their own vital goals is one of the most important things that parents should teach our children and for this, contrary to what is thought, it is important to lower our demand and change it for maintain high expectations and offer unconditional support.
Expect the best of your children
We are all wrong. We all act sometimes badly. We all lose our nerves and serenity. We are all humans. Our children are too and logically, they will err. But each mistake they comment does not mean that they are condemned to repeat it but that they can learn from it. That is why it is essential that we convey our confidence that they are good people, capable of asking for forgiveness, of amending a mistake, of discovering that the emotions are not them nor will they act carried by them harming others. Confiaza, is the key.
Words we should stop using are "always" and "never" when we talk to them about inappropriate behavior. Nobody always does things wrong, nobody does the wrong things and much less always disappoints us. If we tell them that, we convey a powerful belief about themselves and their inability to change. It is essential to cement your self-esteem.
When we convey to our son that we are convinced that he is a valid, good and intelligent person, we are helping him to build his own inner voice and to have tools to handle himself now and in the future.
Educate, do not leave the child alone or tame him
Do not let the child educate himself, convey values. Nor do you tame it by controlling everything you think or do. We should avoid radical positions in ideas about the innate goodness or evil of children. Children, who naturally want to live in harmony and please us, are also human and have reactions that can harm other people or themselves. The role of the adult educator here takes its true dimension. Nor do you have to tame them because otherwise they would be dangerous and selfish beasts, nor do you have to leave them without guidance or contention. Educate your child, it's your role as a parent and adult.
Our role as educators is to influence the child by offering example, teaching and explanations, helping him to understand and express what he feels and discovering the power of personal will to direct actions towards personal goals and also towards respect for the other. Children don't always act well, but of course they don't always do it wrong.
Help him to be happy
When our child is developing communication strategies and violent actions, we should know how to detect him without burdening him with feelings of guilt but reinforcing his self-esteem, his responsibility and being that person they can always trust to better understand and find support, love and reinforcement. Help him to be happy and to be a kind person, respectful, empathic and appreciated by others, without being submissive for it.
Seriously that the key to resilience It's not a bad time as a child. I do not want to say that we are waiting only for whims and fun against the real interests of harmonious growth, but that we make children enjoy their childhood by leaving them time to play, doing with them things that are pleasant and bring us together in beautiful situations. , allowing them to be children and therefore noisy, cheerful, moved and spontaneous.
Value the child for who he is, not for being the best
We have the idea that only the one who arrives first, the one who wins, the one with the best score, is the one who triumphs. But it is not true and that concept is important to transmit it to our children. Fierce competition does not prepare for life, being the first does not guarantee triumph, nor true success, much less the ability to have a productive, useful and happy lifeWell, that really is that you know who you are and what you want.
Not even in the highs is that true. We have all experienced moments of success and great failures. And we have learned to get up, to plan again, to set new goals and above all, the adults that we say happy, we have learned to know ourselves and work to have life that really we, not society or our parents, we wish.
And that teaching is worth transmitting it to our children, valuing what they are, what they love, what interests them, what they are passionate about and what they want to learn again, more than what they win in a sport today, or take out a ten , or those who before or better achieve something. Being the first, in addition, will be much less useful in your life than discovering the strategies by which humans work in teams and cooperate with each other so that any process or area improves. Teach him to think critically and creatively, don't tell him what he has to think.
Give up owning your child's destiny, accompany him, but don't force him to be as you think you have to be. Rest assured that he will be wrong, perhaps, as we all do, but also that he will make decisions that he will live as valid and will not be the ones you would have made. It is another person. Prepare it to live your own life.
That is to say, prepare for life It is not to give the child forced frustrations or pressure to meet external expectations, but to teach him the human values of cooperation, trust, overcoming and empathy. That will help you live better and be happier, now and in the future.
